Inspiration can be an elusive thing at times. Somedays, it seems no matter where I look, I see a painting! Other days, I can't seem to get inspired no matter what I do. Thankfully, those days are few and far between! I probably have about 5 accordian style file folders with all the different pockets in them (seriously!) crammed full and bursting with pictures and ideas, scribbles and notes that I would like to be able to paint. That doesn't include the numerous sketch books I also have filled with sketches and ideas. I call them "My Paintings in Waiting". When I first got injured and was flat on my back for months, I was still able to sketch and write for short periods of time in my sketchbooks. This really helped to fill some of the hours in the days and helped me to realize just how much I had missed this part of my life. I keep teasing my kids that I'm going to live to be 100, because I'm going to need the next 51years to even make a dent in what I would like to accomplish!
It's hard sometimes to not jump around with my paintings. So many things inspire me that I end up with all these paintings floating around in my head. I actually work on several pieces at a time, because I find if something is not working for me, I leave it, and move on to another painting. If I don't do this, I get more and more frustrated, and end up making things worse. Moving to another piece for a while switches gears for me, and then when I return to to the other painting, I see it with fresh eyes again. I also like to "live" with my paintings for a while. I put them up on the walls around my home. In that way I see them in different lights, at different angles, and I get a better feeling for what some one else may see or feel if the painting was up on their wall.
Sometimes when I look at something, an old house, a pair of shoes, or a beautiful landscape, what ever it is, there is a feeling that comes over me, that somewhere in what I'm looking at, there is a painting there. It's not always obvious right away, but I know it's there. It's hard to explain, but something has connected with me, and I have to figure out what it is that is so intriguing, and how to portray that on canvas. I guess it's kind of like being an author trying to tell a story, and trying to figure out what you would like to say.
If I could paint everyday, all day, I would be over the moon! And I still don't think I would be able to get all these paintings out of my head and on to canvas. I am incredibly lucky that I have such a wonderful family who constantly encourage me, and truly believe that I am talented, and really want me to succeed. That is not always easy for me to accept because I think most artists (myself included) have these little eggshell egos, and we are so incredibly hard on ourselves, that compliments and encouragements are not always easily accpeted. I'm working very hard to change that feeling, and learn to accept a compliment//encouragement at face value and take it in the good spirit that it was given. My artwork has been in my heart and soul all of my life, but because of other obligations, had to be put away for so long that I never thought I would be able to pursue it. But now that I've been given the chance to actually work on it again, I hope to be able to paint, and paint, and paint some more! And that being said.......I think I'll go paint!
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